By Carly Newton
Gender-reveal parties are more popular than ever and, unfortunately, it does not look like they are going away anytime soon.
It seems like everywhere you look on social media lately, whether it is Facebook or Instagram, someone is announcing they are pregnant. Followed by pictures and videos of the gender reveal of their unborn baby. It is an exciting time for sure and that should be celebrated, but at what point does that celebration of the announcement go overboard?
A woman named Jenna Karvunidis who lives in Pasadena, Calif. is credited with throwing the first gender-reveal party in 2008. An NPR article “Woman Who Popularized Gender-Reveal Parties Says Her Views On Gender Have Changed” revealed that Karvunidis shared the party on her blog at the time, and now has “some regrets.”
“I know it's been harmful to some individuals. It's 2019, we don't need to get our joy by giving others pain, I think there's a new way to have these parties,” Karvunidis is quoted in the article as saying.
That “pain” Karvunidis was referring to could be attributed to the gender-reveal party by an unknown family in California in 2020 that was responsible for burning 22,744-acres over 23 days. A News Channel 3 article “District Attorney begins reviewing evidence in fire started by gender-reveal party” interviewed Cal Fire investigators who said that the fire was started by a “smoke-generating pyrotechnic device.”
If it was not bad enough that 22,744-acres were burned, a 39-year-old fireman, Charles Morton, also lost his life. It is to be determined whether the family will face any charges for their reckless actions that took a life and affected the lives of many others.
On April 1, another gender-reveal party took the lives of two people. In an ABC article “2 dead after plane crashes during gender-reveal stunt in Mexico,” it noted that two people were killed after the plane they were flying to emit pink smoke out of crashed. The pink smoke was indicating the gender of the baby was a girl before it crashed into the water resulting in the death of the two people inside.
How did our society go from cutting cake to find out the gender of a child to setting fire to large areas of forest that led to a man’s death? Or a plane crashing and killing two people? Imagine being the child whose parents did that? Imagine the guilt that child may live with their whole life?
Tracee Boyea, a mother to two children from Mineville, N.Y., is not fond of gender-reveal parties and did not have one when she was pregnant with either child.
“People have gotten carried away with gender-reveal parties. Finding out the gender of a child is a private moment between parents in an ultrasound room. The thought of sharing that special moment with many family members and friends is not something I agree with,” Boyea said. “If you are in front of a lot of people you probably won’t be inclined to show your true emotions that you would have if it was just you and your significant other.”
Boyea also said that she has attended gender-reveal parties in the past and have not enjoyed them.
“A simple call or text to family and friends to let them know the gender would be better than having a party,” Rand said. “Our generation thrives on attention, on social media presence and on showing off. Having a gender-reveal party lets you potentially have all three.”
In the age of social media people have seemed to forget what a “private moment” is. Not every milestone and event in your life needs to be shared online for others to react to. Keeping stuff in your life private should become more normalized today.
While gender-reveal parties can be disastrous, not all of them are like that, thankfully. Some people want a simple gathering amongst friends to celebrate their baby — that is fine. People who feel the need to go above and beyond in announcing their baby’s gender need to stop.
One person who is in favor of gender-reveal parties is Jordan Quesnel from Ticonderoga, N.Y. Quesnel has two children and happily had parties for both.
“We had a gender-reveal when I was pregnant for my son because he was our first baby and we wanted to share the excitement with our families,” Quesnel said. “When I was pregnant with my daughter, we found out the gender, just the two of us, during the ultrasound. Then we put ‘it’s a girl’ balloons inside of a bag for each of our bigger kids to open.”
Despite the negative attention gender-reveal parties have gotten in the media, and rightfully so, they can still be a unique and creative way to tell people the gender of your baby — just do not start any forest fires while you’re at it.
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